Holding Out for Prince Charming

Alright ladies. I am going to share a bit of information with you. Guys, this applies to you in a sense as well. I turn 20 next month and I have been doing a lot of reflection on my life and soul searching in myself. I have come to a conclusion. I never knew how to be alone until now. I always found my self-worth in boys, just as many girls do. By the start of seventh grade I believed wholeheartedly that all I needed in life was a boy to tell me I was beautiful. I was the girl who always had a boyfriend. This wasn’t because I had all the boys constantly seeking me out. I took the first one to come along. Granted two of these relationships were terrific. The rest not so much. I did learn something from each though. I allowed myself to only be happy when I was with a boy. Then college hit. My very serious boyfriend and I went separate directions. It tore me a part. I didn’t know what to with myself. Then it all made sense. College is the time for me to discover myself, love myself, and have fun along the way.

I realized that I didn’t know the full capacity of who I am without someone in my life. But what kind of life am I really living if that’s how I am living? So, here it goes. Single Sabrina. I have been single for the longest time since I first began this thing that I once called “dating” What is dating really? Middle school it was holding hands on the way to class before a teacher yelled at you for PDA. High school maybe you went on a couple dates? Well, in college things get a little more serious. Things go in two different directions. Hookup culture or a serious relationship.  Chances are your first couple years will come off as a hookup culture. No one will know what they really want. I cant really speak for the men other than let yourself be a gentleman. You see that cute girl, ask her to coffee. Chances are she will want you to. Ladies, hold out for more than Netflix. We all know where that leads. Both genders: realize its okay to have friends that are completely platonic. Friends are good to have. You don’t need to be surrounded by someone who makes your world. Your world should be the things you are passionate about. So here’s a little insight into what I am doing until Prince Charming sweeps me off my feet.

I am loving myself. I am happy. I am on fire for my G-d. I am getting my degree. I am being spontaneous. I am living out my bucket list. I am surrounding myself with all sorts of people. People that love me and think I am beautiful inside and out. I am allowing myself to mature without someone trying to mature me into what they want. I have found my passions and I am exploring them. I am getting an education so I can go educating tiny humans. I am writing again. Clearly. I am exploring my creative side and painting. It might look horrible, but it makes me happy.  I am not dating. If a guy were to ask me to coffee I might just say yes. But its just a latte. I am meeting new people. I am waiting until there’s an overwhelming sense of peace that this is the guy I should start dating before I date again. I am holding out for flowers, going on actual dates, a guy to get the door, and more than just “hanging out.”

So with that being said, ladies it’s time to hold out for flowers and guys who get the door. And until then you be yourself. You do you. Surround yourself with people who love you and appreciate who you are. Men, it’s time to take charge. It’s time for you to grab the reigns and ask that girl to coffee.

http://www.srtrends.com/the-best-us-cities-to-visit-in-your-20s/

Jesus Dunking

The L-rd works in mysterious ways. If you had asked me two years ago what I would be doing after high school I would have said studying marine biology at Oregon State University and being apart of a huge school. Where I am today is the complete opposite. I am going to a vastly growing although small scale school in Arizona, my home state. If you had asked me at the start of my first year of college where I would be in a six months or a year, the answer would have been I don’t know everything but hopefully being an RA. Do you notice how none of my answers include G-d, or include what His plans for me are? That’s because a year ago I had no relationship. It was my way or the highway. For whatever reason my senior year of high school I got the sudden urge to look at Grand Canyon University. I fell in love with it and knew that it was where I would spend the next four years. I fell in love with the school when I got there and I still love it.. At the beginning of the year I did get the little inkling to switch school. I wanted to be in a sorority, go to football games, and be in a whole new state exploring different things. Again, what I wanted, not G-d. I decided to get involved in school. Applying for Freshman Class Council was the best idea that I ever felt led to do. When I saw the poster in my hallway it practically screamed at me. So with G-d’s blessing I was one of the 16 out of 130 to receive a position.

            The people I met in FCC were put in my life for a very special reason. I don’t know if they fully understand how much of an impact on my life they had made. G-d used them to show me His love. They reached out to me in their own ways, each of them slowly building relationships with me. I knew why they were so accepting and so loving. They had a light in their life and a fire in their heart. I wanted it. And for the first time in my life my plan and His plan matched up. I started asking G-d what He wanted me to do. I decided I would be an RA, surely G-d wants me as a student leader and I want to be an RA it will match up perfectly. Wrong. If I were to receive RA I would sacrifice living with my two best friends and sacrificing being constantly surrounded by the people I had grown with over the course of the year through ASGCU. But hey, I was willing to sacrifice it for what I wanted.

            G-d had other plans. I didn’t get RA. And at first I was sad and angry. Then I realized I would get to room with my friends next year and I felt a little better. Then I got a call from the leader of ASGCU saying I received an interview for ASGCU next year. A week later I received the position of senator. The more I thought and prayed about it I realized that G-d had put these people in my life for a reason and they were not meant to go anywhere. They have grown with me in  my relationship with Christ and just recently they were the people to baptize me. At a leadership retreat I felt G-d saying that it was time to surrender everything over to Him and to make it a public proclamation. So April 14, 2015 that is what I did. I got Jesus Dunked and it rocked. Family, friends, and the people who helped me grow this year praying for me and saying how proud they are of me was the best feeling. Aside from the actual dunk. I started out on a new journey with a whole new army of support right behind me. If that isn’t G-d’s love, I don’t know what is.

Grace (n.)

Grace. A noun. A name. A second chance.  the free and unmerited favor of God, as manifested in the salvation of sinners and the bestowal of blessings.

   As the song goes, “ If your grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking.” Well I am sinking. I may have been a competitive swimmer but not my best skill could get me out of this and I am so thankful for that. 

G-d’s love is so powerful. His grace has saved me and it can save you. By grace we are saved, and by grace we can carry on. I have fallen so many times from our L-rd and our rock. Yet, He still stands there with open arms for me. Waiting for me to come back to Him. He never fails me and He never leaves me. At times where I have fallen, I often feel that I can not go back to Him because I am not worthy. I’m not. I’m not perfect, I sin on a regular basis just as everyone else. 

Ephesians 2:8-9 says that exactly. By Grace we are saved and By Grace we can carry on. Being a good person is not the ticket to Heaven. Salvation isn’t a reward, it’s a gift. I often feel that is overlooked. I see it in myself and other people all the time. We think by being good people: going to church, bible study, helping the homeless, and posting on Facebook a nice bible verse will get us into Heaven. We are wrong. 

So wrong.

Why must we share something to show we love G-d. He knows we do, we shouldn’t have to show him how much we love him when it is a convenient time. We should want to do it every day. Not because G-d is awesome, that’s the inevitable undeniable fact. G-d is awesome, we should want to show our love to Him because He did for us. Through His one and only son and the grace of Him, we are saved. EVERY.  SINGLE. TIME. WE . SIN. I can not stress that 

enough. WE ARE SAVED. Grace is such a beautiful thing that no one deserves, but we got it. Want to know why? Because our creator wants to be able to see us happy. Our happiness comes through a relationship with Christ. A relationship that is so private and so wonderful that we get to spend every single day with our G-d. We spend it through diving into the word. Praising Him. Fellowshipping. Prayer.

Prayer is a powerful thing.

Something that we can do to speak our mind to G-d. Tell Him how we’re feeling. But most importantly, listen to Him. 

By Grace we are saved.

You are saved.

I am saved.

By.

GRACE.

Something to thank G-d for every single day.

Something to be excited about.

Something to give us passion.

Something to allow us to live our lives.

And the one thing, that makes me love G-d more than anything in the world.

Dearest Husband

Growing up I saw happiness as something to be found in the opposite sex. From then on, that is what I did. I sought happiness from temporary people. I struggled to find that happiness in someone who I couldn’t physically see or touch. My first semester of college, all that changed. I realized I was never truly happy. In that moment, it may have felt that way. I am finally giving my full heart to the Lord, and letting Him control who is in my life and what role they play in my life.

I recently came across a blog post that inspired me to do this.

http://www.ansleyeudy.com/blog/2015/1/19/to-my-future-husband (here's her blog)

That gave me more things to pray about, more things to ponder, and something to strive for. The post was a letter from an 18 year old girl to her future husband. The Lord works in such mysterious ways. I have been reading a book called Choosing God’s Best. It has been giving me so much perspective on what love is and why it’s better to wait. The blog post gave me some reassurance that I am not alone in this never ending battle of wanting to wait and be single, or falling for the first guy to come along. Just so I can have the adorable couple posts, not be alone this coming valentine’s day    ( which I won’t, its girls night J )  Instead, I am surrendering everything in my life to Christ. Including my relationship status. I don’t need a guy to fill an empty void.  So here it goes.. my own letter.

  Dear Hubby,

I am Sabrina. Your wife. You probably don’t know me yet, just as I don’t know you yet. I have been praying for you recently. Praying for who you are, you to be safe, you to fall in love with the Lord just as I am.  I have been praying for our marriage. I pray that our marriage shines the light of God. I pray that you have a heart on fire for Jesus. I pray that you love Him more than you could ever love me. I pray that when we marry, we pray together. We pray for each other.

I have this list going that describes what I want to have in a man. But I know already you will be so much more than that. God knows what I need in my life and He will provide that and more. Some of the things on my list are silly, girly little quirks like making me feel like a princess. Which I know you will because I am a princess of the Lord and you will love me because you love our great God.

I pray you are slow to anger, that you encourage me through prayer. I pray that I am slow to anger.

I pray we face adversity together and let God lead us in the right direction. I pray that we face our fears together, knowing God is watching over us. I pray that you have a passion to see the rest of God’s beautiful creation with me and we go where He calls us.

I pray for you to carry all the fruits of the spirit : Love, Peace, Joy, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self Control. I pray for me to be these things as well. I pray for honesty in our marriage. And I pray for us to lift each other up always.

I am preparing myself for you by waiting. Waiting until God gives me this overwhelming joy and peace that screams at me to say “yes” to a date, “I will” to a proposal, and “I do” on our wedding day. I am praying for God to allow me to be the woman you are praying for to be your wife. I pray that I become a Proverbs 31 woman and I continue to fall in love with the Lord before I can fall in love with you. That’s just what I’m doing. Allowing myself to fall deeply, madly in love with our God before I can fall in love with you. We’re both going to have to be patient because only God knows when we will connect and when we will marry.

 I pray that you can deal with my horrible jokes, and my ruthless sarcasm. I pray you be a leader in all you do. A leader who ministers to people and helps them in times of need. I pray that you begin to pray for our children before we plan for them. Pray that you be an earthly father for them. I pray that you are their rock. I pray you take our son fishing and give him words of wisdom that come from the word of God. I pray you take our little girl on dates, and show her a true Godly man who loves her.

I pray you will serve the Lord. I pray you are called to action and are willing to serve those actions. I pray you will help me serve the Lord when I don’t know where He is calling me. 

I pray we find each other when we are both ready. I pray we connect with one common thing above all else; a desire to serve the Lord and we both have a heart on fire for Him. I pray until then we are surrounded by people who will stand by us and help us grow. People who will encourage us and fellowship with us. I pray we enjoy this time without each other and do everything we feel the Lord calls us to do. I pray for a good life for you. I pray you live it. I pray for your well- being and your relationship with the Lord.

Well, until the day we meet I will continue to pray for you. I love you already. I can not wait to fall in love with you.

Your future wife,

Sabrina

P. S This is what your wifey material looks like! 

     

I am exactly where I'm supposed to be.

This past year has been a huge change for me. With graduating high school last May, going to Puerto Rico this past summer and being emerged into their culture, moving out and living in a dorm, and losing old friends as I made new ones I struggled with all of the change. It hit me like a train and I didn't know how to react to it. I struggled with finding an outlet or the right person to turn to. My friends and family were only a phone call/short drive away, but there was a part of me that wanted to do everything on my own. So, i wallowed in the sea of emotions that in the end created a tidal wave. I was fortunate to have gotten into Freshman Class Council. The people that surrounded me shined G-d's incredible love and light into my life. My roommates did the same. It has been a rocky first semester until I realized that Christ is the answer. He is the light and the savior. He will prevail and stand by your side no matter what. I have always believe that there is a higher being, but I never grew into a relationship until recently. I am currently so on fire for Christ and His love. Since it is February ( the month of love ) I want to encourage everyone to think about loving people. Just once a day, remind someone or show them that you care. Shine the light of the L-rd and let people see his love.

Restoration and Who am I ?

January brings out a new person in everyone. It’s a fresh start. Out with the bad and the mistakes of last year. In with the arrival of a second chance. A time to redo. A time to start over. For everyone the change is different. For some its the annual health kick until the girl scouts come knocking. For others its a time to get rid of the negative relationships in their lives. For college students, to actually go to class and get good grades. Or finish the show they started binging last semester. Myself included. I have a few new changes in my life. I have turned over a new leaf in my life in which I have deleted the negative relationships that will only bring me down. I have welcomed the ones G-d is blessing me with and I am ecstatic to have them in my life. I have created a home in the college I am attending filled with many people who love and care deeply for me. Without them I would not be here today. They have all had a different impact on my life and created some sort of memory that will forever stay imprinted on my brain and in my heart. This year brings Christ into a whole new light as well. He has become the center of my life. The center of how I will live out my life. January brings in resolution. But the ultimate resolution comes from knowing Christ. Through Him we have restoration. We are forgiven for our sins. Once we accept Christ into our life and we accept the fact that because of G-d’s undying perfect love He sent his one and only son so that we may live past our sins. I have been restored this year and you can too. How great is it that no matter how many times we fall, He is always there to pick us back up. He is a shepherd. The job of the shepherd is to heard in sheep to safety. That is exactly what Christ does. He brings His children, His sheep back into the safety of His arms. Christ has done this for me so many more times than I am worth. But the best part? I am worth it because I am a daughter of the L-rd. Just as you are, my brothers and sisters in Christ. He will take you into His arms and give you the restoration everyone looks for in the month of January. You just have to look in the right places.

Now that I have gone off and given some amazing news to you all, I feel the need to introduce myself. As you can see, I am Sabrina! I am a college student getting a bachelors degree in elementary education. This blog is somewhere that I can share my journey with whoever wants to follow it. I will share the ups and downs college, the good news of the L-rd when He gives me the right words to say, and whatever may come to mind. I pray that this blog will reflect His love and bring Him glory